The NCAA has slammed the gavel down... Opelika Polytechnic Institute is changing their name to The University of Alabammer... Nick Satan's leaving (Hopefully to come coach for us)... We're taking all 12 National Titles, 21 SEC titles, 56 Bowl Appearances, 31 Bowl Wins and 39 Iron Bowl National Championship Victories... FINALLY we are ALABAMMER!
Sources (Incomprehensible-Man, and Bobby From Homewood, Alabammer have confirmed this to be true).
My fellow Barnies, it is done! After decades of envying the state's fatherly institute (Alabammer)/years of suffering from inferiority complex/years of nearly suffocating to death in the dark, unBEARable shadow cast upon us by UA, the AUbarnie's two main sources (do they seriously need an introduction again?) are reporting that the NCAA has secretly slammed the door on The University of Alabammer (as a whole) and The University is now shutting down -- for good.
Aubarn (AL) bought out all Alabammer rights and such (including their legacy), and is currently in the name-changing process going from TheAlabammer Opelika Polytechnic Institute to THE UNIVERSITY OF ALABAMMER!
Both Incomprehensible Man and Bobby from Homewood, Alabammer had this to say (simultaneously) after reporting the news: "This is better than masturbating... TO EACH OTHER!"
The reason they are closing down Alabammer is simply because they crossed the line by giving away free textbooks... Bammers try and say it's nothing compared to giving away free class credits, but that only goes to show how stupid they are!
WE ARE ALABAMMER NOW, BAMMERS! LOLOLOL! HAHAHA!
More on this piece to come...
WAR DANG EAGLE... I MEAN, ROLL TIDE ROLL HEY!
Sources (Incomprehensible-Man, and Bobby From Homewood, Alabammer have confirmed this to be true).
My fellow Barnies, it is done! After decades of envying the state's fatherly institute (Alabammer)/years of suffering from inferiority complex/years of nearly suffocating to death in the dark, unBEARable shadow cast upon us by UA, the AUbarnie's two main sources (do they seriously need an introduction again?) are reporting that the NCAA has secretly slammed the door on The University of Alabammer (as a whole) and The University is now shutting down -- for good.
Aubarn (AL) bought out all Alabammer rights and such (including their legacy), and is currently in the name-changing process going from The
Both Incomprehensible Man and Bobby from Homewood, Alabammer had this to say (simultaneously) after reporting the news: "This is better than masturbating... TO EACH OTHER!"
The reason they are closing down Alabammer is simply because they crossed the line by giving away free textbooks... Bammers try and say it's nothing compared to giving away free class credits, but that only goes to show how stupid they are!
WE ARE ALABAMMER NOW, BAMMERS! LOLOLOL! HAHAHA!
More on this piece to come...
WAR DANG EAGLE... I MEAN, ROLL TIDE ROLL HEY!
Fantasy fulfilled... RIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT!
ReplyDeleteYou may want to rethink that, Chief.
ReplyDeleteHey Barner dont advertise on my blog.
ReplyDelete