I-Man: beat writer for the AUbarnie aka
the only undefeated Finebaum caller.
FUCK THE INTRODUCTION TODAY I'M CUTTING STRAIGHT TO MY POINT...
BAMMER CHEATS. PLAIN AND SIMPLE!
I HAVE SOME INSIDE SOURCES WHO CURRENTLY WORK FOR THE NCAA (WHO I USED TO INSTALL AIR CONDITIONING UNITS FOR) AND THEY ARE TELLING ME ALABAMMER IS CURRENTLY UNDER INVESTIGATION FOR PAYING THE REF'S TO MAKE SURE THAT AUBARN (AL) LOSES. IT'S TWO WEEKS IN A ROW THAT THOSE DIRTY CHEATIN' NO GOOD BASTERDS HAVE SCREWED US OVER AND SOON THEY WILL PAY FOR IT.
ALABAMMER IS NOW FACING THREE DEATH PENALTIES AND LOUISVILLE IS IN TALKS OF REPLACING ALABAMMER IN THE SEC AFTER THE DOORS ON THEIR PROGRAM ARE SHUT FOR ALL ETERNITY.
AUBARN (AL) IS TAKING SERIOUS MEASURES TO PREVENT ALABAMMER FROM GETTING TO THE REF'S IN BATON ROOOOJE BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE BY PAYING THEM TO IGNORE THE BAMMERS IN ADVANCE. THE REF'S DIDN'T HESITATE TO TAKE THE MONEY AS THEY LAUGHED THEIR ASSES OFF WHEN WE HANDED IT TO THEM. WHAT WAS SO FUNNY TO THOSE IDIOTS, I HAVE NO IDEA, BUT AT LEAST WE KNOW BAMMER AIN'T GONNA GET TO THEM THIS WEEK!
UNTIL NEXT TIME... I-MAN.... OUT! CATCH ME LIVE FROM THE CAPITAL CITY OF THE CONFEDERACY ON THE FINEBAUM RADIO NETWORK MONDAY-FRIDAY!
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